Couples Counseling


In my work with couples I aim to create an environment where both members can safely explore their emotions, understand each other more deeply, and bring about desired change and growth.  I do that by helping you develop the necessary skills to listen non-defensively and speak with more sensitivity and compassion. I focus on helping each person fully understand their partner’s perspective.  Mutual recognition of each other’s experience is a good place to start working on the problems that brought you into therapy.  

Areas of Specialty:

•  Intimacy and Relationship Issues

•  Parenting Issues: When parents stop working together 

•  Sexual Issues

•  Infidelity and commitment issues

•  Disagreements about money

•  Problems managing relationships with each other’s extended families

•  Learn to support each other’s unique development and personalities

•  Resolving excessive anger and ineffective communication or restricted emotional connection

When to Seek Couples Counseling:

Conflicts can be enlivening, only if they resolve. It might be time to consider seeking professional help if:

•  Conflicts between you do not resolve

• You find yourself avoiding talking about more and more things because you feel the conversation can degenerate into excessively painful interactions

•  There are topics that every time you try to address you get nowhere

•  Conflictual topics lead to excessive anger and hurt in one or both of you

•  It is also a good idea to consider therapy before things get out of hand

Providing a safe and respectful environment, I can help you:

•  Effective strategies for resolving conflict.

•  Increase communication skills

•  Become more decent towards one another and promote mutual acceptance

•  More satisfactory sexual life

•  More ability to think creatively about problematic emotional experiences

•  Understand yourself more deeply and feel happier

  • Uncover hidden longings that lie beneath recurring dynamics
  • Rebuild trust, safety and friendship in the relationship
  • Express deep or difficult feelings with clarity, presence and respect
  • Feel seen, known and loved using shared, deep listening skills
  • Bear witness to and honor each other’s vulnerabilities and pain
  • Maintain healthy connection with your partner without losing yourself
  • Dispel negative and limiting beliefs that sabotage the relationship
  • Rekindle physical intimacy, sensuality and passion
  • Experience more joy, spontaneity and fun together

Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) and standard Behavioral Couples Therapy (BCT) are used along with Integrative Behavioral Couples Therapy that promotes acceptance as well as change.  Couples learn to prevent emotional episodes where regretful behaviors occur, how to better manage emotional episodes when they do occur, how to communicate effectively.   Couples counseling will help identify what changes can be made, maximize those changes, develop acceptance of what is not or can not be changed, and determine if the result is a satisfying relationship for both parties.  Couples learn how to acknowledge, appreciate, and encourage more of the behaviors and aspects in the relationship that bring joy, passion, and connection.  This therapy integrates the twin goals of acceptance and change as positive outcomes for couples in therapy. Couples who succeed in therapy usually make some concrete changes to accommodate the needs of the other but they also show greater emotional acceptance of the other.

Reconcilable Differences is a book that might be helpful to you.  You are encouraged to read this book during your therapy.

Photo Credit: Federico Capoano